Every Moment

Every Moment:

      Yesterday, I was pretty bummed that I would not be returning to work when I expected to.  I know that my health is the most important thing right now. Ever since Ruthie started kindergarten I was not able to put her on the bus.  I was really sad when she started school and I couldn’t be there. I did get her off the bus but that is a whole other experience.  Since diagnosis, the plan was for me to get Ruthie on the bus so Stephen could get to work earlier and hopefully come home earlier and help me at my hardest time of day.  I start crashing around 3:00 and by 5:00 all I want is to go to bed.   As previously posted I have three children who are very active so there is no chance of me crawling into bed any time before 9:00.  Usually we all walk Ruthie out to the bus.  Shua is already excited to see the big yellow bus and watch his big sister get on it.  He is also fascinated by the family of deer that live on the street.  He waves to them every morning.  He also gets a bus load of kids that wave to him as it goes by which always makes him smile.  I am so thankful that I get to experience this. I am happy to see Ruthie smiling and waving to me as the bus goes by. I am happy to watch Shua watch his older sisters go off to school.  I have to take every moment for what it is worth.

    

        There are other moments that I was able to witness and would like to share.  Some days I don’t get to spend a lot of time with Shua. He is very active and wears me out quickly, but here are some of the moments I have been able to enjoy.  Shua waves bye with two hands above his head.  He alternates one hand and then the other.  When he sees me put on a hat or Stephen put on a jacket he starts to wave.  If you say “where is Shua?” or “where is the baby?,” he will pat his belly.  If he hears “yea!,” he will start clapping.  If he does something that he is pleased with, he will also clap.  He was clapping a lot after he put his milk cup in the toilet.  His mother was not so pleased. He has started coming over to us and putting his head on our laps and cuddling with us.  The girls really find this cute.  They prefer this action over him pulling their hair.

    Shua sitting in the Shua bin.  He loves to sit in bins and buckets.

     Elisheva:  I got to watch her cry….oh wait, she does that all the time.  No really, I have been able to spend more one-on-one time with Elisheva.  In the mornings before school, we will look at books together or play with all of her littlest pet shop toys.  In the game, I am usually the frog and whatever animal she rejects that morning.

 One of Elisheva's morning games.

   

Ruthie:  Ruthie is gone most of the day at school.  I have already talked about putting her on the bus.  I know that means a lot to her.  During the school year I am very busy in the evenings.   However, I don’t have papers to grade or lessons to plan right now.  I do have some extra time to spend with Ruthie.  Sometimes I read a book of her choice to her.  Sometimes she does an art project and shares it with me.  She either puts on a little play, song or a dance before bed.  I usually do not join her :)

   In closing, I sometimes feel like everything else is happening around me and I am standing still in time.  After yesterday’s emotional roller coaster I stayed up late thinking about many different things.  All these moments I have been able to share with my children over the past few months helps me continue to fight the fight.

    As I wrote this blog the song came to mind.