Hair

Hair:

          We all knew that it was inevitable that my hair was going to fall out.  We knew that it was not going to be immediate and would happen 10-14 days after the first Chemo treatment.  The nurses said that usually after your second treatment your head gets tingling and then it starts to fall out.

          Well, I had my second treatment. I did have some tingling of the head but just kept ignoring the signs.  I am not one that truly cares about her hair. I usually brush it and throw on a hat. I don’t style it, dye it, curl it, or do funky things to it. It is just not my style.  So I guess I find this whole hair falling out situation ironic.

          Yesterday was truly a great day.  I did not have a headache after treatment. I was able to eat and hang out.  I was able to leave the house for a little bit.  However, the day before, I noticed that when I brushed my head, more than usual amounts of hair came out.  Yesterday whenever my hand got close to my head, there were lots of hairs falling out.

          Last night I sat on the couch for a half hour trying to watch a funny show.  Instead I ended up crying as I pulled clumps of hair off my head.  Can’t really explain why it made me so sad. I knew it was going to happen, I knew it was time.  It just really brought tears to my eyes.  I just compulsively pulled my hair out….tied it in knots and added it to the pile. 

          Last night with tears in my eyes, I texted my Aunt to see when she could come over and give me a good shaving J  We were going to do it on Friday, but  I just couldn’t see myself pulling out hair for the next two days.  So with a little help from my friend who is a few steps ahead of me on this journey, and some wise words from a young boy who lost his hair and regained it “hair is so unimportant in the big scheme of things”—Lenn when did you get so smart?, some late night hand holding from Stephen (in between the needed tissues), and some texts from friends, we have set the date for Wednesday to shave the head and move past this stage.

          My aunt came and she did what needed to be done.  Ruthie and Elisheva took some turns cutting some of my hair.  They were fascinated and were accepting of the job that needed to be done.  I got comments of “cute ears and nice shape head.” Of course we took some pictures through the different phases.  Some might get posted and others will not.   Am I happy with the outcome?  I am not a fan of no hair/short hair but it is part of the getting better.   Please don’t ask to see my hair.  If I have a hat on or a bandana on, then that is how I want you to see me.  In the end I still have more hair than Stephen :)

“Hair is very unimportant in the scheme of things.”  Lenn Brown